A client came to me recently because his marriage as about to fall apart as a result of how much he worked. He was a successful entrepreneur and was very proud of the business that he had built from the ground up, but he had very little time for his wife and their three year old son…
This is a very common issue in today’s day and age because there is so much pressure placed on us to be successful. However, there are some very important tips and tools that can really benefit your relationship and I want to dedicate today’s article to this topic. It absolutely IS possible to figure out how to balance work and family, and if you want to know how, you have come to the right place.
So if you work too much and your partner is struggling with it, let’s dive right in!
How to balance work and family: tips from the pros
If you are familiar with our philosophy, then you know that we are specialized in healing relationships, and one of the biggest things truths in relationship recovery is the following:
The best way to recover from a breakup is to not have one.
I know that there are so many different reasons for tensions in relationships, and there are just so many different things that can create a rift between two people. As you know, because you have sought out this article, not being able to balance work and family is a big thing that can break a relationship apart.
I am very glad that you are already being proactive and have made the effort to seek out information on the topic. This already indicates that you are on the right path. So many people choose to ignore the problem until it is too late, and as a love and relationship expert, I can honestly tell you that it is WAY easier to fix a relationship while the two people are still together than to have to put the pieces back together after a separation.
The truth is that this is a problem that can affect every single person. People have jobs, people have responsibilities, and people have relationships. With the amount of things we are all juggling every single day, it comes as no surprise that there can be tensions in this department. It is especially common in relationships in which one person works and the other doesn’t, or the other person is at home taking care of the kids.
How to balance work and family: An exercise
When I am working with a client who comes to me for tips on how to balance work, family, and career, I often start with a simple exercise, and I want to share it with you here. Go ahead and make a list of all of your priorities in order of importance. Think about things like your profession, your goals, your husband or wife, your kids, your extended family, exercise, your friends, your passions, your hobbies…
Write down all of the things that you prioritize the most in order of importance. In doing so, you will be able to identify where work and your relationship fall on this list. Does your partner come before your job, or vice versa? That is something that you need to know for yourself. If you don’t, you aren’t going to know where you’re supposed to be allocating more time and energy.
In the majority of cases, a person who is in this position will immediately respond that of course their partner comes first, of course their relationship is their #1 priority, of course their significant other is more important than their job. But as they begin to really dissect it, they realize that this might not be the case. I am telling you this because getting a very clear picture of the situation, and your needs, is a crucial part of the solution.
So many people are career oriented and despite the fact that they always thought that they were relationship and family life oriented, it turns out that they aren’t. When it begins to come to light, as you can imagine, it can cause problems in their relationships and families.
Balancing work and family: Making the best decision for you and your family
I know that this is a difficult subject, and it requires that you ask yourself a lot of tough questions. But by doing the work, you will be able to set yourself up for happiness. You will also be able to set your family up for happiness.
Now that you’ve spent some time analyzing your priorities, there are two options. Your job is to identify where your priorities lie, and you also need to ask yourself if staying in your relationship is the right idea. If your partner wants to be a big priority in your life but deep down, you know that it isn’t going to be possible, and you know that fundamentally, your job will always come first, then it is your duty to be honest with yourself and honest with your partner. Many people that I work with who realize that their job is their top priority try to protect their partner from this truth simply because they don’t want to hurt their partner, but the reality is that by keeping the truth from them, they are also preventing their partner from finding true happiness in their lives. It is important to be transparent with your partner and to give him or her all the information, so that they can make informed decisions.
At the very least, your partner needs to be aware of what they can expect from you and what you can deliver in this relationship. Having an honest conversation about this will help both of you to manage your expectations.
Now, for many of you who are reading this, you will be realizing that your partner truly does come before your job. So, what do you do now? Well, now is the time to set boundaries with your work. The truth, and you know this, is that work will never set boundaries on you. It is entirely on you to decide how much time you dedicate to it, when you’re working, and when you aren’t. There is always more work that can be done, but you have to set boundaries so that your significant other can feel more important in your life. You have to actively nourish your relationship.
What does setting boundaries look like? For example, you can decide to not work on Sundays, or not check emails on a Saturday. Or not be checking documents on your phone when you’re supposed to be spending time with your partner or your children. You can do things like leaving your work phone in a drawer when you come home from the office. It’s all about being present and making the effort. You can also schedule date nights in your calendar that cannot be canceled for work-related reasons. Your partner needs to know that she or he can rely on you showing up for this relationship. A healthy relationship cannot be maintained by one person alone. It’s a team effort.
For some romantic ideas that you can try, I encourage you to read this article. It is also ideal to boost the attraction in your relationship, and to do so, I recommend downloading our new program that you can find here.
How to balance work and family: It IS possible
As you know, we have dedicated our lives to helping people coach themselves at home through whatever challenges they are facing in their relationships. Join the Happily Committed Project and learn how to transform the dynamic in your relationship in a meaningful and dignified way. You are already on the right track by seeking out more knowledge on how to balance your work and your family, so it is clear that the willpower is there.
By working with me or a member of my team, we can ask you targeted questions and define a tailor-made action plan for you. To book a session, all you have to do is click here.
Remember, the most important thing is being clear with yourself about where your priorities lie. Once you do this, you can discuss it with your partner and work as a team to find the solutions that benefit your relationship the most.
I sincerely wish you the best in life and love,
Your coach when you want to know how to balance work and life tips