When two people have been together for a long time, which is usually the case when they’re married, it’s not unusual for one or both of them to start missing that passionate feeling that accompanied the beginning of their relationship.
That craving to spend time with their partner, that deep rooted feeling of missing someone you love, and that passionate desire for them. Where does that feeling go? If it has fizzled out, does it mean that the love between you is gone?
No, of course not! Relationships will inevitably change and evolve, and the passionate feeling will diminish over time. That said, it does not mean that you’re condemned to a lackluster relationship in which your wife no longer desires you. It just means that you’ll need to put some work into creating a shift in the current dynamic.
I’ve been a love and relationship coach for many years now and I can confidently tell you that if you’re asking yourself, “How to get my wife to want me,” there are plenty of tips and tools that will get you the results you’re looking for.
In today’s article, I’ll be going over what these techniques are and how you can make her want you again! Here at Happily Committed, we believe that with some of these tips and tools you can really help to secure and reinforce the longevity of your relationship.
Sometimes a little moment of disconnect between you can serve as a catalyst for very important changes, especially when it comes to romance and intimacy, and it can set you out on a new path towards happiness with your partner.
How to get my wife to want me: The secret to it…
Let’s start things off with the biggest and most important thing that you need to keep in mind when you want to figure out how to make your wife want you. Women want to be feel loved, cherished, and heard.
Make sure that you listen to her and make her feel heard and understood.
Without being able to emotionally connect, it’s going to be considerably harder to make her feel close to you and to make her want you! Generally speaking, women want to be able to connect and share what’s going on in their lives, and that connection goes hand in hand with emotional and physical intimacy.
It’s not about wining and dining her, showering her in extravagant gifts every day, or making giant declarations of love all the time. Again, your wife wants to feel heard and understood.
Sure, romantic gestures are always great, but connect with her and she will feel inspired to want to connect with you. This is an issue that I see on a regular basis, especially when people come to me asking “How to get my wife to want me again.”
Take Robert for example. Robert was living in California and had been married to his wife for almost twenty years. He reached out to me because he and his wife had stopped feeling close, and they had stopped being friends a long time ago.
Both of them where living their lives on auto pilot, just coasting through life focusing on their kids, their jobs, their friends, and their hobbies. Basically everything except each other…
The disconnect that had developed between them became especially apparent when it came to the bedroom. There was essentially no intimacy between them anymore and they were living like roommates.
They had built separate realities even though they were both living under the same roof and were sleeping in the same bed. They weren’t able to relate to one another and their lack of empathy was damaging their connection.
Fortunately, Robert was able to apply the tools that I’ll be going over with you in this article, and I am happy to say that they are happier than ever now. It’s dangerously easy to settle into a relationship and find that the romance has faded away. But don’t worry, there are solutions!
How to make your wife want you: The best techniques
I just went over the importance of making sure that your wife feels important to you, and this should be the foundation of your approach. There are however other tips and tools that will serve you as well, and let’s not forget the fact that actions speak louder than words.
So if you want to make your wife want you, and especially if you’ve found yourself thinking, “My wife loves me but doesn’t desire me,” I encourage you to start to do the following things. You can begin incorporating these solutions into your daily life starting today, and you will see a sizable shift!
My wife has no desire for sex, what can I do?
Another client came to me asking about how he can reignite his wife’s desire to be intimate with him, and I explained that in addition to doing things for her, he needed to be doing things for himself as well.
For example, it’s crucial that you take care of yourself physically. Not only will this make you more sexually attractive, it’s also going to boost your sense of self confidence. The better you feel about yourself, the easier it will be to make your wife want you.
So make sure that you carve out time to hit the gym, make an effort to eat a healthy diet, present yourself well in terms of your clothing and your personal hygiene, and always put your best foot forward. Your wife will notice this, and it will inevitably make you more attractive in her eyes.
How to get your wife in the mood: Surprise her
When the routine settles in to your relationship, make sure that you break out of it! ‘
You know your wife better than anyone, so you know what she likes, what she wants… and what she wouldn’t expect from you! You can use this to your advantage and come up with surprises for her that can make her feel loved, but also excited about spending time with you.
An idea would be to ask her to meet you on a Friday night at an address, and when she arrives she realizes that it’s a hotel room that you’ve booked for the evening. Wait for her with a bottle of champagne and enjoy your night alone together. You can reconnect and make her feel special by going out of your way to do something she wouldn’t expect!
Give her space when you want your wife to want you
People often don’t realize that if they don’t give their wife space to miss and desire them, then the constant monotony of their relationship will damage the intimacy.
On the other hand, if you give yourselves the opportunity to miss each other by giving each other space and by focusing on elements of your own personal lives, it will become much easier to feel excited about reuniting.
So be careful to never suffocate your wife or act needy and clingy. I really want to stress the importance of never making her feel like you’re begging for sex. It’s not attractive and it puts you in a position of weakness, and she’s not going to find it appealing. Instead, focus on presenting yourself in a way that would make her see you as someone confident, who listens to her and can anticipate her needs, and knows how to surprise her.
How to make your wife happy with romantic gestures
The power of romance should never be underestimated. If you really want to make your wife want you, I encourage you to think outside the box and really let her see how romantic you can be. Don’t ever let her feel taken for granted, because I can tell you right now that she’s not going to want to get intimate with you if she feels neglected.
Instead, go out of your way to do little things for her on a regular basis that make her feel special and loved. Leave her little love notes hidden in her jacket pocket, pick up her favorite pastries from the store that she never has time to get to, take care of that oil change so she can take it off her To Do List, thank her for the little things she does for you like making the bed or stocking the fridge…
Make her feel appreciated. Let her see that you’re going out of your way to make her happy even in the little moments of day to day life.
We’re all so busy all the time that it’s easy for us to start taking each other for granted without meaning to do so. You can hit the reset button and surprise her by injecting romance back into your relationship!
How to seduce your wife by improving your own life
Another thing to keep in mind when you want to make your wife want you is the power of ambition. When she sees you working hard to be the best version of yourself, she’s going to find it extremely attractive. There is nothing sexier than ambition.
Make it a point to pursue your personal and professional goals and devote time to these things every single day. In addition to it improving your quality of life, it’ll give her a chance to miss you AND be impressed by you, which will make your romantic gestures have even more of an impact.
Always work towards improving your life as an individual and your life as a couple. Don’t put things off and grab life by the horns. The more active and ambitious you are in her eye, the more attractive you will be. We all need to be careful to guard against laziness because it can undermine our relationships and our personal or professional goals.
Making your wife want you again is possible
I know that you miss the passion and intimacy you experienced with your wife when your relationship was new, but believe me when I say that you can get that back. It’s just going to require some proactivity on your part.
So like I said in this article, make sure that you’re making your wife feel loved, cherished, heard, and understood. Be open to her wants and needs, keep them in mind and anticipate them. Whether you’ve been together for two years or forty years, be careful to not let her feel neglected in your relationship.
Go out of your way to surprise her and make romantic gestures for her. They don’t have to be grandiose – just think about the little things that you can do that would make her feel special. Intersperse them with bigger things from time to time, like planning a weekend getaway together.
You want to make sure that you’re always innovating and coming up with new ways to have fun together.
In addition to this, give her space to miss you and be careful to never make her feel suffocated. Use this time to work on yourself so that you can become the absolute best version of yourself! Don’t let yourself go and don’t give up on your ambitions and aspirations. I’ll say it again – nothing is sexier than ambition.
In order to boost the attraction between you and the one you love, I encourage you to check out our new product specifically designed to help you do this!
As always, we are here to help so please don’t hesitate to reach out. Join the Happily Committed Project and learn how to transform your relationship in a meaningful and dignified way. We can offer you tailor made advice to fit your specific situation.
There are solutions to every issue that a couple faces as long as they’re willing to put in the effort, and we can offer you the guidance you seek.
I sincerely wish you all the very best in life and love,
Your coach when you want to know how to get a wife to want you