You might be doing everything you can to save this relationship, but like I was saying, it’s also going to be very important to pay attention to how your significant other approaches the situation. If you’re trying and trying, but your partner is being selfish at all times, it’s not going to work.
So keep an eye out for whether or not your partner is constantly choosing justice over forgiveness, and whether or not they’re always trying to make you pay for wrongdoing. If one partner systematically refuses to seek understanding of the other person’s thoughts, feelings, and desires, it could be time to end a relationship.
How do you know when your relationship is really over: Indifference
Another thing to ask yourself when you’re wondering if your relationship is really over is how you and your partner are feeling about fighting for each other.
If it feels like one or both of you has become emotionally detached, if you’ve lost hope, and if you only have negative memories of the relationship, your relationship might be over. If you or your partner are no longer afraid of losing each other, it’s going to be hard to find the motivation to fix the situation and save your relationship.
Make sure that you pay close attention to what both of you are willing to do to save this relationship because that can answer your question of whether this relationship is really over.
Knowing if a relationship is over comes from being honest with yourself
As scary as it might seem, being completely honest with yourself about the state of things is crucial right now. Like I said at the very beginning of this article, it’s all to easy to turn a blind eye to the problems at hand and try to convince yourself that nothing’s wrong… but that’s not going to provide you with any real solutions.
At this point, you have to do some introspection in terms of how motivated you are to save this relationship, and you need to analyze the relationship and your partner’s behavior. If you want to know if your relationship is over, keep a look out for these elements:
• You feel you’ve tried everything and there’s nothing more that you can do
• Your partner shows no interest in saving this relationship and is not afraid of losing you
• You are not afraid of losing your partner
• One or both of you are constantly playing the blame game and are not taking responsibility for your actions
• Seeking justice is more important than working at a team
Sometimes we forget that a relationship is not a project to be completed or a problem to be solved, and the dynamic between two people begins to shift. This is when things start to feel more tense and other problems begin to arise. If nothing is done to diffuse the problems, they can amplify and turn into issues that really threaten a relationship.
More often than not, there are solutions available to help you save your relationship and I invite you to reach out to us if you know that the relationship still warrants the effort! Join the Happily Committed Project and let us help you transform your relationship in a meaningful and dignified way. By asking you targeted questions, we can help repair your relationship or even help give you a concrete answer to “Is my relationship ending?”
We are here to help you every step of the way, so please don’t hesitate to reach out.
I sincerely wish you all the best in life and love,
Your coach when you’re wondering “Is my relationship over”