As we start things off, I want to take a moment to clarify a very important element of what it means to be a romantic husband. We know that romance goes hand in hand with sweet and thoughtful gestures, affection, gifts, and love. We often forget, however, that romance goes much deeper than the stereotypical “acts of romance.”
An enormous element of romance has to do with cultivating a relationship with your significant other in which they feel understood and cherished. This is where the pillars of healthy relationships come into play. The more you cultivate the foundation of your relationship, the easier it is to bring more romance into the picture. Plus, it makes your romantic gestures that much more powerful. So, what elements am I talking about here?
Well, the first pillar is unconditional love. It’s important to accept one another for all your qualities and for all of your flaws. Don’t try to change who your significant other is, and practice loving them for the person that they are. This can become a great source of romance. Not doing so can led to a confrontational, tense, and combative relationship.
Next, and this will come as no surprise, we have communication. We have written a gigantic article on the art of proper communication and I highly encourage you to read it by clicking here, but for our intents and purposes, I want to bring your attention to recognizing the appropriate time to talk about conflict. By learning the art of having productive conversations whenever you have disagreements, you can create an atmosphere in your relationship that makes both of you feel safe and understood. You will learn the techniques for this in the article I mentioned.
To quickly summarize for you, the best time to talk about relationship problems is when emotions aren’t running high, because picking the wrong time to talk about them can hurt your relationship in the long run.
We also need to think about the small gestures that really charm your partner’s heart because this is where we start to hone in on how to be a more romantic husband. Emotional nourishment and a sense of romance can really open up your partner’s heart, especially if you express this love in your partner’s love language. For those of you who are unfamiliar with love languages, there are five and each person communicates love through one of them. Understanding a person’s love language will teach you how to show them love in the way that resonates with them the most. But I am getting ahead of myself here! I will expand on this in a moment.
Another element of romance that people don’t think about is freedom. It’s important to feel free to be yourself and to give your partner the freedom to be themselves, as well. Both of you should dedicate time and energy to your own goals and aim to find fulfillment outside of the relationship. When you are able to spend time on your own projects, goals and actives, the time to spend together becomes much more meaningful.
Not to mention the fact that it makes it easier to have interesting things to share with one another when you’re spending some time together! Believe me when I tell you that couples that are able to find fulfillment in their personal lives, outside of their relationships, have a much longer success track record than those that don’t!
Now, I know you’re probably impatient to learn about the concrete tips I have for you on how to be a romantic husband!
Let’s talk about those Love Languages again. These are truly the most valuable bits of information that you could have when you are working on preserving or bringing back a sense of romance to your relationship! AS I mentioned, there are five of them.
- Words of Affirmation
- Acts of Service
- Quality Time
- Physical Touch
When a person’s love language is “words of affirmation,” it means that he or she expresses and receives love is through speech. For example, this could be when a person enjoys talking about their emotions, talking about future plans, special memories, and love in general. They would resonate with hand-written letters as gestures of love, for example. And, this will come as no surprise, but the words “I love you” are incredibly important to them.
If a person’s love language is “acts of service,” it means that they show love through gestures. For example, they would go out of their way to do something nice for you, or something that they know would make you smile. Sometimes a person whose love language is words of affirmation will have a partner whose love language is acts of service, and they might feel like they aren’t being shown love. It’s simply because they are speaking to each other in two different (love) languages and where one is showing love through words, the other is showing love through actions. It is therefore very important to become aware of your partner’s love language so that you can understand how they are showing you love and how they need to be loved!
The third love language is about gifts, and this is when a person communicates love through items that symbolize love. It’s not about expensive or lavish gifts – it’s about thoughtful gifts that show a person that their partner cares. If your partner values this love language the most then you will see that they truly enjoy the careful selection process, the thought that goes into it, and the moment that the gift is given.
Quality time is pretty straight forward and it just means that a person really values spending meaningful moments with the person they love most. For example, uninterrupted and focused conversations during which you are able to truly share with one another. Physical touch is also very straight forward, but it’s not just about sex. It’s about signs of affection that include hugs, caresses, kisses, holding hands, and cuddling, as well.
The more you pay attention to your spouse’s love language, the better. If you are unsure of what their love language might be, then don’t hesitate to have a conversation about it! These are very healthy things to talk about that can give you great insight into how to love each other better. As I said, the more information you have and the better foundation you build, the easier it becomes to bring more romance into the relationship!